Value the Bonds!

"Before I say what's on my mind. I'll like to point out that I'm not in my feelings or venting this is just my thoughts. We are not promised on this earth. We don't know when it's our time to leave or someone else's. We only get one shot at this and should try to get it right. I understand that it's your life and you can do whatever you want. However, don't forget the people that's in your life. This life that we live is way bigger than us and we need to learn how to stop being selfish. The relationships we have with people is bigger than us and we should try to give our best in them instead of just trying to get something out of it. That other person you have a bond with has feelings and a heart as well and you should treat them better. If your not going to do right then stop wasting their time and leave from their life. That goes for every relationship that's out there and everybody (moms,dads, brothers, daughters, friends, girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, wives, etc.) . If your not walking into someone's life with good intentions, then don't bother. We need to be better. I'm not perfect and I'm a little selfish too but I have to get better too. Just my thoughts."-Chuck

This excerpt was written by a member of my family. It sums up how we really should be looking towards all of our relationships. The people we work with, our closest friends, our farthest friends, and especially our own families. Treat your bonds with others as yourself, we treat ourselves as priority. Remember, life is short and make everyday a day worthwhile. 

Find Harmony and Balance

We all know the struggles of a relationship!

Faithfulness, Love, Support, Caring, and so on and so forth!

Every person questions these things about their partners.

Are they faithful?
Do they love me like they say they love me?
Will the support my dreams?
Will they take care of me when I'm sick?

Through all these questions, we will never hear the answer we desire sometimes because we are human and we all fall short.

To find Harmony and Balance in relationship takes time. Sometimes and some relationships it will not be easy times. But those uneasy times build character and muscle in relationships.

Our hearts are muscles that need constant cardio to be strong and the same goes for our relationships.

No it is not suppose to be inflicted on purpose but those times of testing the strength of those muscles will come. If a muscle is weak it will fail and die. If a muscle is strong it will succeed and survive.

Being two different people makes it hard sometimes because we all have our ways. Find a balance and meet in the middle about certain things. The more you find a balance the more you'll find harmony in your relationship.

Practice Compromising-Practice Communication-Practice Caring

These are strength builders for any relationship. Let them build yours up!

We all want to hear this... Only if you mean it. 

How to have a Stronger Marriage from One Big Church on Vimeo.

Cheating is a form of violence to the soul of another human. It is horrifically wounding. It is a monstrous act of terrorism to the heart.Cheating is an hurtful thing to do to anyone no matter what the problem is. Its heartless, and cruel. If you respect, love and cherish the person than cheating would never cross your mind. If you're not getting the attention you want or bored of your relationship than set the person free instead of hurting them; Keeping a secret of betrayal is harsher than breaking up. Anyone who would cheat on their spouse is a selfish individual. Cheating is a form of abuse. We give our trust to someone who takes that trust and tears it to pieces. No one should have to go through that.

How to help your partner with Trust Issues

With the mixed signals society gives us today: "Have integrity- Stay Faithful!", You're young- don't take relationships seriously!, many people are confused and leave others in heartbreak and anguish. It is safe to say that no one wants to be hurt but that's the results of lying and cheating. So why do it? That's for another post... this post is for those who need healing and lovers who want to help. When someone has been cheated on and lied to- they will have issues trusting others. If you're with someone who has issues, you're in the right place. I first want to thank you for caring for them enough to read tips on how to better your relationship. Now here's a few tips on how you can help:

What's the best thing you can do for someone who has trust issues?

1. FIRST AND MOST IMPORTANTLY DO NOT do anything that will cause them to not trust you. If you are genuine like you say you are- there will be nothing to find right?! Start your relationship off on a good note and keep it that way. The groupies got to go, that "one" ex got to go, all of your bullshit that you'd pull while single have to go, or you have to go! It's simple. If an issue with your groupies can develop into a huge issue: shut that shit down immediately before it turns out to be a disaster! DO NOT LET IT GET OUT OF HAND. BE COMPLETELY HONEST & OPEN!
2. Don't play into their insecurities If you know that certain actions will set them off please do not do them. Sometimes we have partners who will tell us how to help them feel more secure in their relationships with us but we're to selfish to listen. If you're out all night and come home in all hours of the morning, it will be hard to trust you. If you don't reply to them while you're out or don't call them or show that you're thinking of them, it will be hard to trust you. What is your partners triggers?
3. Continue to genuinely love them. The keyword here is Genuine. A person with trust issues can feel it when you're trying too hard or being fake. Live in your truth, love in your truth. If you don't like them as much, take your time to develop your feelings. Their nitpicking causes them to be very keen to bullshit. If you genuinely love them, they will know and begin to trust you.
4. When having discussions about cheating. Be genuine about how you feel about it. However, please note that if your nonchalant about the issue your partner will pick up on it and have a hard time trusting you. Why? Because if you do not think it is a big deal, you'll most likely hurt them. When you are passionate about not cheating your partner will feel a huge relief. Remember: if you're not genuine about not cheating your partner they will pick up on this too.
5. Don't take their inability to trust you personal. That's if you haven't done anything to make them not trust you already. Remember it's not about you- it's their own personal issue that they're trying to sort out. These feelings were caused by someone in the past and not they're trying to be wise about who they let in their life. Just don't play into their insecurities.
6. Be understanding. Let them vent to you exactly what happened that caused them to not be able to trust someone. This person has been through traumatic situations and sometimes being experiencing those same feelings in their current situation can make them uncomfortable. This person has Been through something, it's not about you.. It's about what they've been through.
7. Have patience. If you're genuine this person will trust you but they need time to heal and time to see you in action. Just keep showing that you are true and they'll get it in due time.

There you have it! Remember it takes time, patience, and genuine love! Good Luck!

Song of the Day 6/22/2013